CHAPTER 6 - BEREAVEMENT

 The period between late 2021 and late 2022 was the most difficult period of my life by far, in terms of physical, mental, and emotional challenges. Even though I was taking care of my nutrition, I had lost weight, was looking pale, and my eyes were hollowed out. At that time, I was on the correct dose of blood thinners, and I experienced changes in my menstrual cycle. My trusted gynecologist, familiar with my medical history, helped me manage the impact of blood thinners on my periods, which could lead to iron deficiency and medical interventions like a third stroke in my case. In just 2 months, my haemoglobin level had already dipped to 8.1g/dL, which is quite low. So, with evaluation, my gynecologist immediately recommended that I get a hysterectomy to prevent further setbacks. 

I was back in the hospital within 3 months of my stroke.

My gynecologist advised me that I could return to my daily activities after a week, provided I took certain precautions, such as avoiding heavy lifting and excessive bending. I was in sync with the doctor’s idea of getting back to work. Taking extended or frequent time off wasn’t an option for me, because I had to keep my job. I could manage the administrative tasks at the office as everything was still functioning online.

Despite challenges with my health and mobility, I somehow managed to push through and keep going on with work and my everyday life. This went on for nearly a year, and from May 2022, all educational institutions returned to fully in-person mode. Unfortunately, with this change, I found neither the strength nor the motivation to do the job that was very dear to me. I loved my students, and always cared for them. I could no longer manage the college as a Principal, so I decided to quit. 

Quitting my job served another purpose, in that I wanted to spend quality time with my husband, who was looking quite frail. Over the past year, his hospital visits had become more frequent, and we were seriously concerned about his health. He was continually deteriorating, and in just 3 months of being home, I lost this battle as well. This was the most painful and heartbreaking loss imaginable. I had lost my soulmate, and our world was turned upside down. My children were devastated, and we were overwhelmed by a grief deeper than anything we had ever known.

Neither my kids nor I were in the right mindset to notice that my health had declined rapidly. I could no longer walk properly. I feared that I had lost all the progress I had made. What little I had recuperated, had all been reversed.